All About Mr. A

Mr. A asked me out.  I think.  If you check out my last post you can see that my OKCupid profile contains a plea for folks to message me if they are interested in accompanying me to comedy shows, even if they find me entirely unappealing in a romantic way.  Mr. A asked me to go see comedy and failed to indicate his level of attraction based on my profile and photos, so it is entirely possible that he is so superficial as to be interested only in my body, literally, sitting or standing next to him at a comedy show.

Anyway, this is Mr. A:

I fully admit that this is merely an incredibly useless sketch/caraciture of Mr. A., but it would be both unfair and unkind to post the much more flattering and pleasant personal photos he chose to post on OKCupid.  But I also believe it would be silly and less interesting to provide no physical representation of my potential suitor, even if said representation is about descriptive as the following narrative: from the three photos Mr. A posted, he appears to be a somewhat full figured fellow with freckles, dark hair and a beard, who is fond of baseball caps and hoodies.

While there are many categories, 11 to be exact, in which OKCupid users may provide information, Mr. A chose only to include two; the most generic "My Self Summary" and the potentially more specific and enlightening "I'm Looking For."  Mr. A chose to "rattle off" a few random facts about himself and these facts suggest to me that he has a sense of humor, appreciates pop culture and media and survives without pledging his allegiance to any specific deity.  These are all attributes that I appreciate and have in common with Mr. A.

Based on my multiple comedy/comedian profile references Mr. A messaged me and initiated a conversation about the Boston comedy scene and my interests with respect to comedians and podcasts. Good move, sir.  I replied but was soon convinced that I had somehow upset or dissapointed my fellow comedy lover as I found my reply unanswered for a week.

More after the jump.


Does Mr. A hate the comedians or podcasts I referenced?  Did Jerry Seinfeld, a man for whom I expressed intense admiration, once punch Mr. A's mother in the throat, thereby creating a life-long, appropriately held hatred for the prolific comedian?

I also considered the possibility that Mr. A simply reconsidered and found me boring, superficial, idiotic or so unnatractive that even standing next to me in public seemed intolerable.

Alas, following a full week of radio silence, I received an apologetic message from Mr. A replying to my response and recommendations and asking me to accompany him to a comedy night at a weekly comedy show held at a Boston drinking and dancing establishment.  I accepted.  Our rendezvous is scheduled for one week from yesterday evening, November 9th.  You may now eagerly await my assessment of both Mr. A and the comedy we shall hopefully enjoy, or mock, together.

Beginning with Mr. A, and for all future suitors, I intend to keep an incredibly scientifically valid inventory of those qualities and other indicators I feel strongly about.  Deal makers and breakers, are what I'm talking about.  I must admit to a level of insincerity in my "mission statement" wherein I vow to date every man that requests the pleasure of my company; should a man fail in too many areas I simply cannot subject myself to basking in his presence.  I also reserve the right to turn down any men that appear "serial-killer-y" or otherwise give me creepy vibes.  Suffice it to say I may impose age limits; old dudes are not shy about propositioning much younger ladies.  If I fail to accept the initial advances of an online admirer I intend to layout my objections in this blog.  Further, when I do so choose to meet a man he will be subjected to a bit of a superficial, meaningless and completely arbitrary grading scheme invented by me and subject to change at any moment.  More on this soon.